
A quiet moment, a whispered prayer, and the gentle hope that surrender brings peace—even before the answer comes.
I’ve been struggling. Not in a loud or visible way, but in the quiet corners of my heart. The kind of struggle that hides beneath the surface while life continues on—where I smile and do all the “right” things, yet inside, I’m aching.
Lately, I’ve been asking the hard questions.
How do you truly let go?
How do you turn something over to God—and mean it?
How do you find peace not just in words, but in your spirit, when things still feel unresolved?
A friend said to me, “It’s a matter of trust.”
And if I’m honest, that stung a little. Not because she was wrong—but because I so badly want to believe that I trust God fully. I say I trust Him. I want to trust Him. But if peace is the fruit of that trust… where is my peace?
I look at others—people who’ve been through valleys of their own—and they carry this stillness, this steady hope. They say, “God’s got it,” and they mean it. Not just with their words, but in the way they sleep at night and smile in the morning. I want to feel that. I want to know that kind of release.
I go to church. I sit in Adoration. I journal my prayers. I pour out my hopes.
But deep down, I’m still holding on tight—clutching the outcomes, overthinking, imagining worst-case scenarios. And maybe that’s the hardest part: knowing I’m doing all the things, yet still feeling like I can’t quite let go.
Another dear friend reminded me gently: “You can still want what you want. You can still ask God for the desires of your heart. But you’re not in control. That’s never been your job.”
Maybe that’s where peace begins—not when we stop caring or hoping, but when we realize our caring doesn’t have to come with control.
When we whisper, “Lord, this is what I long for…” and then pause long enough to hear, “I know, child. And I’m already at work.”
I don’t have all the answers today.
But I’m learning that surrender isn’t a one-time thing—it’s something I may have to do a dozen times a day.
I’m learning that peace doesn’t always come all at once—sometimes it trickles in through tears, through prayer, through trust that feels fragile but is still real.
If you’re struggling like I am—if you’re losing sleep, aching for answers, doing all the “right” things and still feeling stuck—I just want you to know you’re not alone. And your struggle doesn’t make your faith less. It makes you human.
And maybe that’s enough for today.
Jenny